Though they’re often thought-about jokes these days, the tiny Smurfs are titans of popular culture. I’m not speaking about these three live-action/CG motion pictures that got here out final decade, though they made a cool billion collectively. I’m speaking in regards to the ‘80s cartoon that ran from 1981-89, had 272 episodes, and has been distributed in additional than 100 nations. The Smurfs are beloved world wide—a feat that solely will get extra spectacular whenever you keep in mind how bewilderingly horrible the cartoon may very well be.
Look, I don’t wish to punch down right here, so to talk. The Smurfs is a present primarily supposed for youngsters youthful than those watching big robots attempting to beat one another up; as such, the tales are typically shorter, less complicated, and sillier. Plus, the Smurfs have a massive European fairy story vibe, which supplies their tales much more leeway to be a little bizarre. As an example, 1) Grasping Smurf, 2) a bizarre vine grows by means of the village and kinds an impromptu phone community, and three) a witch’s curse causes the Smurfs to lose the flexibility to really feel feelings, and the one treatment is for Grouchy Smurf to present a fairy a hug. There’s no honor or glory in knocking the Smurfs for doing precisely what it got down to do…
…except they failed at what they got down to do as a result of they only didn’t give a goddamned smurf, comparable to in “A Float Full of Smurfs.”
It begins with a legion of Smurfs hammering a wood chassis and wheels onto a massive cornucopia to create a parade float for the Autumn Carnival, a Smurf vacation that has by no means been talked about within the present’s earlier 103 episodes, nor will it’s within the remaining 158. On condition that eight Smurfs are working on the float concurrently (with room to spare), it’s massive sufficient that Smurfette is anxious they received’t discover a bunny large enough to tug the float. Peculiarly, nobody worries that they received’t discover a bunny prepared to tug the float.
In the meantime, hassle is brewing at Tailor Smurf’s mushroom hut, the place the six Smurfs who shall be driving within the float in conventional Autumn Carnival animal costumes are all complaining that their costumes suck. These costumes are useful however admittedly not nice, wanting like they had been swiftly made despite the fact that that is clearly an annual vacation. However we don’t know what Tailor Smurf had going on through the weeks main as much as the carnival; he might have been fairly busy with different tasks. We do know all six costume wearers are horrible, shitty Smurfs as a result of we’re listening to them concurrently gripe, complain, and demand repeated alterations till Tailor Smurf screams and quits, presumably muttering about how his ex-clients can smurf themselves with a soiled smurf.
Alas, Tailor Smurf’s offended resignation isn’t the Autumn Carnival’s solely drawback. Due to his Almanac, the evil wizard Gargamel is aware of the vacation is tomorrow and learns that its foremost exercise is for a bunny to tug a float that six Smurfs experience in. So Gargamel concocts one among his most pathetic, demeaning plans ever in hopes of kidnapping sufficient Smurfs to make gold from, his sole aim in life. He places on a bunny costume and hops into the forest in hopes the Smurfs will choose him to tug the float.
Let’s not speculate about why Gargamel had a bunny costume in his closet, or why it’s so soiled and ratty. Allow us to as an alternative focus on his plan, which does occur to have a few flaws:
- The bunny costume doesn’t embody a bunny face.
- Gargamel’s face, in its entirety, is clearly seen by means of the opening the place the costume face would go.
- Gargamel is roughly 8-10 instances the dimensions of a common rabbit.
It’s exceedingly ridiculous, even for a character who received tricked into pondering he’d died twice over the course of the cartoon, nevertheless it’s considerably extra ridiculous that it really works.
Clumsy Smurf joins Nat Smurf—quick for Pure Smurf, who someway loves nature greater than all the opposite Smurfs who stay solely in nature—of their seek for a potential float-toting bunny. Clumsy falls into a gap the place they discover a mom rabbit and her 4, small, floppy-eared kids, however Nat says they’re too small to do the job. So when the dimwitted Clumsy spots the Donnie Darko-esque nightmare of Gargamel hopping and singing by means of the forest, he begs him to tug the float tomorrow and the wizard fortunately agrees. None of them think about that bunnies neither sing nor discuss, a truth established solely a minute prior when Clumsy met the actual rabbits.
Again in Smurf Village, Papa tells the six costumed Smurfs they had been appearing like smurfholes and to apologize to Tailor. They accomplish that, and it seems he can churn out six vastly improved costumes in a single day so long as Smurfs aren’t being shitty to him.
The solar rises on a new day and the Autumn Carnival, which isn’t a carnival within the slightest. The one seen attraction is the float, which I suppose might technically be thought-about a carnival experience, besides that solely six Smurfs get to be on it and people Smurfs had been chosen way back. Extra depressingly, the one-float parade appears to be the Autumn Carnival’s sole occasion. On condition that the Cornucopia seems to be to be a foot lengthy, and the diameter of the complete Smurf Village doesn’t appear to be any longer than six ft max, I’m guessing the parade could be over in about 30-40 seconds. It’s virtually as miserable because the sight of a grown man in a rabbit costume getting hitched to the float, and it not occurring to a single Smurf within the viewers that this mutant rabbit has the distinctive face of their most persistent enemy.
As soon as he’s hooked in, Gargamel sprints away, cackling over his success, the six Smurfs within the float screaming in terror. Papa Smurf asks Nat to get his “forest friends” to assist out, which ends up in a pack of wolves chasing after Gargamel, who detaches the float to run away. Sadly, the wolves are rather more all in favour of consuming the hideous rabbit-mutant than saving the float, so the Smurfs crash safely into a creek and Gargamel is cornered at his entrance door.
There’s actual, unearned pathos to watching Gargamel frantically attempting to flee being torn aside by wolves and his pathetic groveling when he can’t discover his door key, attempting to persuade the wolves he’s not price consuming. And let me guarantee you the wolves completely plan on consuming Gargamel alive. It’s solely as a result of Papa Smurf convinces the wolves that that is a uncommon bunny they’re not allowed to eat that Gargamel survives. Then the episode ends with the Autumn Carnival one-float parade, with the somewhat bleak twist that despite the fact that Nat had deemed Mrs. Bunny and her kids not highly effective sufficient to tug the float, the Smurfs, with no higher possibility, have enforced the rabbits to tug it anyway. It’s a horrible decision to a dumb drawback brought on by a ludicrous battle instigated by a half-assed premise.
Look, in the event you make over 200 episodes of a TV sequence, any TV sequence, you’re positively allowed some stinkers. You get twice the latitude when these episodes often have two distinct tales apiece. So I don’t begrudge these tiny blue sprites or the individuals who labored on the present a lot in any respect. However I’ll say this: Should you write any story that hinges on protagonists who know what rabbits are instantly and inexplicably forgetting what rabbits are, it’s in all probability price smurfing again to the smurfing board.
- Both Gargamel shrinks or the cornucopia grows massively when the wizard will get hitched to the float as a result of they’re instantly the identical measurement. This might simply be defined within the story by a little bit of magic, and it completely shouldn’t be.
- On the very finish of the episode, it’s revealed that the Smurfs do have a marching band that leads the float, and the present makes the attention-grabbing option to have them be terrible. They’re taking part in the long-lasting Smurfs theme, however all discordant and out of rhythm. It’s a fascinating concept, and completely insufferable to take heed to.
- The second half of this season 4 episode was “Smurfette’s Sweet Tooth,” which Wikipedia summarizes thusly: “After Smurfette eats her entire year’s worth of smurfberry candy, she casts a spell to give her the ability to turn everything she touches into smurfberry candy.” Clearly, it’s not cool that Smurfette goes Queen Midas in her gluttony for sweets, however possibly Rationing Smurf must be doling out the entire yr’s provide without delay, hmm?
- Whereas I discovered this complete expertise fairly distressing, I did kindle a newfound love for Grouchy, whose solely persona trait is to scream “I HATE [insert word here!” to nobody particularly and for no purpose. Issues Grouchy hates on this episode: Leaves, the carnival, being a frog, calling the entire thing off, your recommendation [to Brainy immediately], complaining. A personality who can angrily and non-ironically yell “I HATE COMPLAINING” is one I’d prefer to see extra of.
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